Chapter 9: Sundae

Summary: When meeting with Kez doesn't go well, Ryan takes Grace out for ice cream to recuperate.

AN: Warning for discussion of unreality in this chapter.

As much as Grace insisted she was fine, Ryan refused to budge and continued to fuss over her. He sat her down on a nearby bench and then sat right next to her.

“We’ve gotta figure out how to talk to Kez again,” Grace pressed. “We don’t know how much time we have left.”

“We’ll get to that. For now…I just wanna know what’s going on with you?” He asked. “With the whole blank expressions, and the static thing you mentioned–”

“It was nothing, Ryan,” she insisted. “I told you. I’m just a little tired, so my mind plays tricks on me sometimes. I was just seeing nonsense.  And… please don’t talk to Simon or anyone about this?”

“If it’s nothing, why don’t you want me to tell them?”

Grace bit her lip. 

“I just don’t want anyone to worry about me.” She leaned her head on his shoulder and looked up at him. “Especially you.”

“I mean, you’re really important to me, Grace. No shit, I’m gonna worry about you. Especially since it seems you can’t control when stuff like this happens.” He looked down at her. “Besides… wouldn’t you worry about this compromising our plans later on?”

Grace glanced away from him, fists together in her lap.

“I just don’t think you’ll be able to help me here. It’s… a really weird situation.”

“Try me.”

She was quiet for a beat. 

“Could we get ice cream first? Like old times?” She asked, looking up at him. Ryan was a little thrown off by the sudden shift in conversation, but nodded. Maybe this would get her to open up a little more. Besides, he was a little hungry from not eating breakfast this morning.

The two of them took a bus to get to the nearest ice cream parlor. Grace remained really close to Ryan, not looking at any of the other passengers. Ryan reached out and squeezed her shoulder. 

Thankfully, the parlor did not seem too busy when they arrived. A smattering of teens and young adults populated the tables in the back, chattering amongst themselves. Grace and Ryan took a spot in the corner while they waited for the server to come over. Ryan watched Grace in the meantime. Grace pulled out some napkins from the container and started folding them. 

“Whatcha making?” He asked, leaning forward. 

“Stuff,” is all she said. “It’s a secret.”

Ryan tried to smile but he felt the hairs on his neck bristle. 

“Ok… so, about those dream-visions you’ve been having…”

Grace pursed her lips and kept folding her napkins. 

“Well… This didn’t start recently,” she finally admitted, playing around with a folded crane. When I first found the notebook, I tripped and fell hard trying to leave. It knocked me out. When I came to, I had a splitting headache, but at least the notebook was still in my arms. But I was in too much pain to continue my search, so I went home and looked at the notebook after I recovered.”

Ryan winced as Grace recollected the memory.

“So… you think the notebook is cursed?” he asked tentatively. “Or maybe you got a concussion?”

“What? No, I… I don’t think it was a curse. Or a concussion. While I was out cold, I felt the sensation of something at the back of my head. Like bugs. And no matter how much I swiped at my head the feeling never went away for as long as I was out. In my mind, I mean. ”

“Is this when you started seeing static everywhere?” he asked.

“Well, kinda,” Grace said. “I found myself in this dark room. But it wasn’t me.  I mean it was me seeing everything but the body I saw, those arms and legs weren’t me. And I was wearing some sort of uniform tracksuit. My hand had a number on it! Lots of them, actually all over my arms!”

“Maybe you somehow jumped into someone else’s dream by mistake,” Ryan suggested. “Ruth is always going on about stuff like that. Mom says not to look into it too much, though.”

“But why would I jump into someone’s dream in the middle of the forest?”

“...Good point. So… did anything else happen in this dream?”

“I think… I saw One-One in the front of the room. I was yelling something but I couldn’t decipher it. Then I picked up something cold and metallic and ran at him. He popped out of whatever hole he rested in and ran away while I tried to strike him.”

“Jesus Christ,” Ryan said. “Whoever this person is really had a grudge against One-One. Maybe it’s…Kez?”

“No, it didn’t look like her at all.”

“Did you end up catching One-One in this dream?”

Grace looked away from him, eyes downcast.

“He hid behind this weird white face mask thing with flame coming out of its eyes and on its sides and so many robotic arms with claws on the end. We kept fighting for what felt like hours until I knocked the mask clean off the larger robot’s head, One-One was exposed,” she continued. I tried to pull him out but he kept clinging to what was left of the other robot until eventually…I ripped him in half. Half of One-One was stuck in the robot, and the other half flew out of my hand and crashed to the ground. Then it just… scurried away and the larger robot thing collapsed in a pool of oil rapidly spilling onto the floor..”

Grace glanced up from her napkin folding to look Ryan in the eyes. He looked back at her, not detecting a single lie in her voice or face. He reached out to her gently.

“Grace…”

“I know it sounds overly specific and far-fetched but I’ve been replaying the same moment over and over ever since and it always ends with some big and green train coming at me before I wake up. Sometimes it’s the dreams, other times I’m just surrounded by static, and it’s become more frequent since finding One-One in the woods,” she sighed. She sounded like she wanted to say more, but focused on her napkin origami.

The two sat in silence awkwardly for a while. A waitress showed up with their ice cream bowls. Plain vanilla with a cherry on top for Grace and a small banana split sundae for Ryan. As always.

“Enjoy your food,” the waitress sighed before walking away. Her gloomy demeanor sharply contrasted the bright colors of the uniform she donned.

Ryan hungrily dug into his ice cream soon after. Grace popped the cherry into her mouth quietly before gradually starting on the frozen dessert.

“I figured you’d be more excited for the ice cream, Gracie,” Ryan finally said after watching her for a bit. “I’ve never seen you eat so unenthusiastically.”

“I am,” she insisted, her face flushing. “I just… want to savor it more, y'know? Before we get back out there and deal with Kez.”

“I thought you wanted to go back to Kez as soon as possible?”

Grace is quiet.

“...”

“Grace?”

She shakes her head and looks at Ryan with a determined look.

“Yeah, we need to get back to that,” she said. “Thing is, I don’t think Judy’s gonna let us back in any time soon.”

“Maybe not Judy… but I know someone else in the house who might let us get through. I could call Portia and explain what’s happening.”

“Should we really tell her about the stuff with the train? She seemed really freaked out as is. What if she goes to the police? Then they’re bound to stop us from going forward.”

“She won’t, I’m sure. I’ll talk to her. I bet she’s got a lot of questions about One-One. For now, your ice cream is melting. If you don’t want it, I can take it–”

Grace gasped and finished off the rest of her ice cream before the two of them scrambled out of the ice cream parlor together. Ryan took out his phone and called Portia. After the third ring, she picked up. 

“Hello?” 

“Hey, Porsche…”

There’s a pause. Ryan shifted awkwardly on his two feet.

“...Ryan?”

“Yeah, it’s m–”

“What the hell is going on? Why did you and your friends just show up unannounced at my house? What was that white thing Kez freaked out about?” Portia fired off so many questions before  Ryan could get a single word in.

“Portia, hold on! I can explain everything.” He finally managed to cut in.  

“Please do.”

“You gotta let us back in first.”

Another pause.

“Judy really doesn’t wanna see you guys back here…” she said nervously. “She was pretty adamant about it.”

“Please, Portia? We just need to speak to Kez again. It’ll be just me and Grace this time, promise.”

A soft sigh could be heard from the other end of the line. 

“...alright. Judy went out for a few hours. You guys better make use of that time well,” she sighed. “And Ryan?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m glad you’re back. Even if… this is a super weird way I had to find out. We should catch up one of these days.”

“It’s good to be back too. And we will,” Ryan said before hanging up. He returns to Grace texting on her phone.

“Simon says they haven't been able to get much out of One-One. We’ve really gotta talk to Kez,” she says, her brows furrowing in worry.

“We’re going,” Ryan said.

The two scramble back to Portia’s house, where she was waiting on the steps. She looked up expectantly, tapping her feet on the stairs. 

“I told Kez to wait for you guys. She’s ready to talk now. But…”

“What?” Ryan asked. Portia stepped up closer to Ryan.

“I’ve gotta ask, what’s been going on with you this past year? You practically dropped off the face of the earth, I thought you’d…that something bad happened.”

“I just needed to get away for a while,” Ryan said before she could continue. “I… I didn’t think anyone would notice or care ever since—”

“People would care, Ryan,” she interrupted. “And people do care now. People like me. And Min-Gi, and Grace. And your family.”

Ryan felt his face flush, hoping his reaction wasn’t too obvious to Portia. 

“I dunno…” he finally said as Portia led them through the door once more. 

Kez sat on the bed as she had before. Her eyes, which usually had a small twinkle in them, were vacant and empty. Her hair had several strands loose, more so than there usually are. Her lips were pulled into a grim line. When she looked up, she mustered up a weak smile. 

“You’re back,” she said. “Sorry about the whole… thing with me losing it before. It’s just… seeing that damn little robot brought back some memories.”

“From the train?” Ryan asked. Kez nodded. 

“He promised me something important if I helped him and he didn’t keep his end of the deal! ”

Her eyes grew misty with regret. 

“And… What was the promise?”  Grace asked gently, sitting on one side of Kez while Ryan sat at the other. 

“He said he’d help me see my friends again,” She finally said.

“Your friends in the real world?” Grace asked. Kez shook her head.

“When I was on the train, I met a group of passengers trying to make heads or tails of the train like I was. I decided to join them, and things were great for a while. I got really close to some of the other passengers…some a bit closer than others,” Kez said, blushing. She cleared her throat and continued. “We met some kids and they tagged along for a while but they got separated from us. That’s when things started to go downhill.”

Kez frowned. Grace gave her a sympathetic look.

“The group fell apart?”

Kez shrugged. “It was one disaster after another. Eventually it was just me and two other people.”

She clutches the hem of her shorts tightly.

“You don’t have to continue into that part if you don’t want to, Kez,” Ryan said softly. “But…where does One-One come into play?”

“He told me he was looking for his mom or something,” Kez recalled. “He said he’d fix everything with my friends if I got him to the engine of the train.”

“And once he got there he double crossed you?” Grace gasped.

“What? Not exactly. There was some old lady in the engine when we got there. She had numbers up and down her arms. She chased us out of the engine, so we had to figure out how to get her out of the way.”

Ryan and Grace sat intently on the bed as Kez explained what she and One-One had to do, and how the plan almost succeeded. Before she knew it, One-One and the notebook were shoved into her arms, sending her backwards into a glowing door.

“Another thing Kez,” Grace said. “About the notebook.”

“ I wanted to get rid of it,” she interrupted. “I was off the train. But my friends were still stuck there. I tried to look for that train again, but One-One told me I’d never be able to find it. I wanted to get rid of every single reminder of that train. And to make sure One-One couldn’t follow me, I made sure he remained stuck in the ground. Until he like, lost power or whatever. I was almost done with the notebook when I heard someone coming. So I just ran off.”

“I’m so sorry, Kez,” Ryan said.

“And now I’ll never see any of them unless I find that train again!”

“One more question, Kez?” Grace asked. “I promise we’ll leave you alone after this but…. Do you know how the train showed up for you to begin with?”

Kez shrugged. “I was at a party with my friends. The ones in the real world I guess. I promised that I’d be responsible for the band performing but one of them got stage anxiety and hid in the bathroom while the other left in anger.”

“That sounds like a really awkward position to be put in,” Ryan murmured.

“That’s not even the worst part.” Kez drew her knees to her chest. “When I tried to apologize for the band flaking… My friends said they were expecting me to fail, and that they found it super funny. I… I wasn’t trying to be funny.”

“Your friends suck,” Ryan said bluntly. “No offense.”

“Ryan!” Grace cut him a look before turning back to Kez. “And the friends you made on the train?”

“They were a lot nicer. They never laughed at me when I messed up, and even if they got mad it didn’t last long… most of the time. If I’d do it all over again, I’d try even harder to keep them around.”

“What happened to them? Why can’t you see them anymore?” Ryan asked. The painful silence that followed lingered in the air. 

“When my old friends left it was just me in the warehouse. Then a train showed up.”

“In the warehouse?”

“Yes!”

“And no one else noticed?”

“Not that I knew of. At that point, I just wanted to be anywhere but here,” she said with a shrug. “So I went inside. And that’s when I woke up on the train.”

“So the train shows up at the worst possible moment in your life…”Grace murmured.

“I doubt it,” Ryan piped up. “Otherwise that train would’ve come for me long ago.”

He tried to lighten the mood by chuckling, but the two girls in the room just stared at him with concern.

“We do know the train shows up when you have a problem you can’t deal with on your own,” Grace said, standing up. “We’ll figure it out from here. Thanks, Kez. And… I’m sorry about your friends.”

Kez shrugged, hugging her knees closer to her body. “I hope you guys find what you’re looking for.”

“We will.” Grace insisted. “And… maybe we can find your friends too.”

The two of them left after saying goodbye to Portia. Ryan noticed he’d gotten a few missed calls from Mx.Sangster and decided to call them back. He waved Grace off and told her he’d catch a bus to go home before Mx.Sangster picked up.

“Hello, Mr.Akagi?”

“Hey, Mx.Sangster,” Ryan said, trying to sound casual. “What’s up?”

“About the audition coming up. Listen, I know you’re still upset about the changes–”

“I already said–”

“Ryan… I can only take on one person for this contract. Like I said the last time we talked, it’ll be between you and your band. I’ll be here with two of my associates, and we’ll vote on which of you we’ll take.”

Ryan felt the color drain from his face, a cold and nauseating sensation arriving in its place. He’d already learned this news in the morning, and yet hearing it a second time didn’t make the blow hurt any less. It didn’t make his anxiety any better.

“But…” He managed to get out. 

“If it makes you feel better, you’ve already got my vote. And I have no doubts you’ll be able to wow the others, kid. From what I’ve seen in the short time we’ve seen each other,  you’ve got star power.”

“I can’t do this without my friends. They’re the only reason I came back to town. They’ve got as much star power as I do! Plus…it’d break Min’s heart to choose only one of us.”

“If I could, I’d take all of you together. But my hands are tied. I’m sorry, Ryan. I think this is something you’ll have to talk to your friends about and decide what you all really want. See you soon, kid.”

The bus ride home felt dreadful. He kept his hands folded tightly in his lap as he watched the houses and trees pass by. He kept going over what he would say to Min-Gi, but none of them sounded good enough for Min-Gi. Nothing he came up would  cushion the blow.

Min-Gi was washing the dishes when Ryan dragged himself inside. His boyfriend’s face broke out into a grin upon spotting Ryan, and he wrapped his arms around Ryan’s waist almost immediately after.

“Missed you,” Min-Gi murmured. 

“I uh…missed you too, Min,” Ryan said. Min-Gi suddenly pulled back and took a good look at Ryan.

“You look really pale,” he said. “I’ve got some leftovers in the fridge to warm up if you want. I figured you might be pretty hungry by now.”

“Thanks,” Ryan said numbly as he sat down at the table and slowly ate the leftovers Min-Gi prepared for him. Min-Gi sat down across from him at the table, looking apologetic

“Truth is, I’m sorry I got all moody earlier today when you got off of the phone. I know how important this audition is to you and for us. You’ve gotta be under a lot of pressure lately. I should’ve understood that,” Min-Gi said, reaching for Ryan’s hands and holding them gently. “I need to trust you more, and I’m working on that.”

“Come on, you know I’m not bothered by that anymore, Min.” Ryan’s eyes refused to leave the plate in front of him and face Min-Gi. “I know you’re worried about things but I promise everything is gonna be ok.”

“I know,” Min-Gi said softly. 

“Just… bring your A-game to this audition,” Ryan finally said after a long pause. “I’ll handle the rest.”